On Making Excuses

I was just reading an article about what someone thinks you should never say at a presentation. It is full of attitude, and presented with authority, and I found myself uncertain that I agreed with parts.

The first thing said has to do with "excuses" at the beginning of a speech like "I am jet lagged" or "I was just invited yesterday." I suppose those things could come off as excuses, but I think they can also bring some context to the conversation. I also think it could be the pink elephant in the room if somehow it seems obvious to the crowd that something is not quite right.

I think it could be an effective way to connect - if it is more of a statement of what is the fact of the matter, than a reason for doing poorly.

We do not often seem to be able to state things as they are without them somehow being labelled as an excuse or as a problem when whatever the thing expressed can be perceived as negative. 

I think there is a misconception that things that appear faulty in some way are inferior in some way because we are always aspiring for perceived perfection.

In the process, we have labels that get us in line. Excuses are never seen as positive. The word is used like a lion tamer's whip, pushing the person who said it back into a vulnerable, defensive position.

As I think about it, excuses probably come from a weakened, vulnerable and defensive position. If a person could just be themselves without fear, and say what and how they truly felt, a person might not be inclined to explain something away.

What the author of the article writes is more about the author himself than it is a universal statement of what is "right," and yet there will be people who will take what he says to heart. For some, it may be exactly what they need to hear because maybe the way they will present will come off as an excuse.

However, I think there is a worthy distinction that is not addressed in the article, and that I have never seen addressed anywhere else. I am not sure we have it as an accessible distinction because of the culture we have, and our need to be as perfect as possible and to fix the things we perceive as anything less than that.

After reading the first comment, I decided to add this amendment. Perhaps it isn't the best way to start a talk, but if it comes from a genuine place within a person, it might just be the place for a speaker to begin. To me it depends on "where" it comes from/originates. 

Even if I was to agree ultimately with the idea of the writer, I might have taken more issue with his why than anything else. As with most anything, we all are sensitive to something, and it can't help but come out when we express ourselves. 

The writer has his stuff, and I have my stuff. In addition, those in any audience will have their stuff. There is virtually no way to have communication without people's stuff commingling.

Any which way, I think conversation is a great gateway to thought and introspection. Thanks to the first commentor for helping me clarify something for myself in her response.

To see the article,

Ten things a person should never say during presentations, click here

http://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/10-things-speakers-should-never-say-th.html#/jeff-haden/10-things-speakers-should-never-say-th.html