Thursday, July 9, 2015

What may not be "right"

I just saw something about a person telling Caitlyn Jenner to "get over herself." Apparently the person felt that all Jenner has been doing is wearing nice dresses and doing photo shoots. 

I started to think about the situation - at least the one I am superficially aware of. I have all kinds of thoughts about it, as I imagine most people do. But the one that stands out for me is the one that points to the possibility that Caitlyn is living the life she wants to live. 

And most people will never really understand what that looks like, sounds like, feels like - IS like because they have their reasons to not be who they truly are, not say what they really feel, not do what they really want to do. 

A person who has broken out of the limiting "should" framework of self will be much more likely to understand when another does it, or wants to do it, than someone who is determined to be a person other than who they really are. I suspect, but could be wrong, that some of the most critical people are jealous of the fact that another "gets" to live life as they do. I would guess it is no where near a conscious determination, though. So much of this type of thing isn't.

As I write this, I think about how I have been called jealous when I speak up. I have given it a great deal of thought, as it has come up more than once. The conclusion I have come to is that while I might very well wish I had whatever the other person might be getting, I do not believe that what I am talking about is motivated by jealousy. 

For that reason, while I may generically make a statement like the one I did above, I would not ever make it as one that is absolute. I would probably not likely say it to another directly, either. Just because someone speaks out and up about something does not mean there is jealousy. It doesn't necessarily mean the person is off or wrong in some way. 

The need we have to make others wrong about what they say and do I think comes more from our own need not to be wrong about we say and do and believe. After all, if someone believes something very different than what we do, the thinking goes that one of us has to be wrong. We can't both be right. And if someone is going to be wrong, it ain't gonna be me!

What may not be "right" is the idea that someone needs to be wrong.  

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