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Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Feeling Overwhelmed & Under Pressure

There is so much I am trying to do.

I have the Expo next weekend, and I wanted
to get some things to give away. It would,
however, need to be a trade with any company
that would be willing to do that. There isn't
much time to make that happen.

Then, even if they agree, everything design-
wise needs to be completed tomorrow, because
of other things I have going on.

I finished writing my talk today for the Expo,
but I don't know if it's a finished, finished. There
are details about the talk I do not know yet, and
it is stressing me out a bit, as well.

I still have to figure out what I am doing in the
vendor part of it all, too. And it doesn't help
not knowing if I have a company willing to
help, or not.

Christina is also enthusiastically working on
my new logo for World of Perspective Radio,
and she also has other great ideas for me, but
it just feels like too much at the moment!

I am supposed to have a meeting on Friday with
a couple of people regarding something else that
is a bit time-crunchy, and I just don't know that
I can handle it.

The IRS issue is still hanging over me, too. That
was supposed to be resolved this morning, but
it was not. So now it is yet another thing pushed
to tomorrow.

My environment is in chaos, papers from the
last 2 years are piled up. Certainly not a conducive
environment for peace. Someone told me to spend
a little time each day working on it.

If only it was that simple.

I really feel like I want to scream!

And then there is a snow storm headed this way
which could create all kinds of havoc. I know
that Mercury is retrograde right now, and I
think it is definitely affecting things.

I may have to let one or more things go. I just
don't know yet which ones. I really find it hard
to do more than one thing at a time. I don't know
if it is chemo-related or if it is just too much or
even a combination of both.

I just feel really weird a lot of the time I have
deadlines to meet. It is like a huge weight on
my shoulders. I really don't want anyone to want
anything of me. I know that is not realistic, but
I am not sure what I can do about it. How do
I tell people that I need handling with kid gloves?

I try.

But there are all kinds of assumptions that are
made that I don't know how to speak to them
otherwise. I am excited about the beginnings of
my show again, as it may be my out of the fiscal
mess I am in, but the way is not clearly paved
and boy, does the idea of the potential work
involved add to my stress.

Putting energy into the show is only going to
work if I start making money. I really hope
something happens/clicks - and soon! And, of
course, the fact that I am still financially strapped
and stressed and running out of money is not
helping in the least.

Being as busy as I am,
I have to hope I have
some income soon.

I can't keep this up.

But I also don't know
what else to do.

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