I am not really starting over.
If I was, I would have a full head of
curly, deliciously wonderful hair.
But at the same time, my next
treatment will be using a new
chemotherapy, thanks to the
reaction one of the first two had.
I have been told that likely my
symptoms will be similar to what
I have had up until now. BUT
there is the caveat that everyone
is different, and one never knows.
I could even have no reaction.
So even though I kinda got a
routine from my treatments
so far, a new "known" in my
unconscious (new familiar
territory), I am now about to
embark into new territory.
My apple cart has been upset.
It is almost humorous to me that
I want the discomfort I know
rather than the discomfort I haven't
a clue about.
It is almost humorous because
much of life is like that, it just
isn't so blatantly obvious.
We fight for the familiar, whether
it works, or not, whether it is
healthy, or not, and whether it
is good for us, or not because the
good we get is in the familiarity
of it all.
I have been feeling tired and
unsettled for a few days now.
I am guessing this has something
to do with it.
Soon the mystery will be gone,
and my new experience will begin.
It just so happens it coincides with
the eve of my half way mark.
A part of me soooo wants to sleep
at the moment. Another part is my mind,
which is reeling right now. It doesn't
want to shut down.
Guess we will see how it all turns
out as I am about to begin another
blog on another topic...
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