Friday, August 14, 2015

Stuff at this stage in the game

I often see very large suitcases. I used one when I traveled in Europe for 3 months when in college. That was my version of packing "light." I wasn't a terribly good packer back then. I would often take full sized shampoo bottles. I didn't know any better.

There were several years I did not travel much, and then September 11 happened, along with significant travel restrictions. That, in conjunction with luggage handling issues, had me determined to pack purely carry-on.

I have traveled twice for a month since then, utilizing only a small carry-on bag. It has helped that the clothing has been of the summery type. I am not sure it would be as possible with heavier clothing. Both me, and those who have witnessed my packing, have been amazed.

I got to wondering today what it would look like if I had to condense my daily world into something smaller-sized. It really makes you pick the stuff you really like, want, and use. There is little room for the maybes and just in cases. Often they get bumped in favor of something else.

The fact is there are many things I could likely do without, and would never miss. Every now and again I consider doing a purge. Moving twice recently helped that process. Another likely move may help that again. 

I am fairly certain I have less stuff now than I did when I came from California. But, then again, there are replacements that have made their way into the mix. The idea of moving now is even more intimidating. I wasn't dealing with as much chemo before as I am currently. I was still tired, but nothing like it is at present.

I am wondering if I need to begin purging now. A little something every day so that when a move does happen, maybe I will have less to worry myself with. I am not sure it is possible, though, when my energy is non-existent, or used up going up and down the stairs to make food and eat, and then clean-up.

I was told exercise helps depression. Hard to exercise when I can barely move. The other day I bent down to pick something up, and it was extremely hard to get up. Thank goodness I had the counter nearby, and the upper arm strength to get me back to a standing position. One of the reasons I am uncertain about living by myself at this stage in the game.

I am not sure I like the idea of being with someone, but I am not sure that it is a terribly good idea to be alone.

I have so much to think about, and figure out. Some people are overwhelmed by just hearing about it. I get to live it.

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