Wow. I just realized how many videos I have done since I was diagnosed.
34.
(Bet you already knew that. What are you, psychic? :P)
That is more than I ever did before diagnosis in total over the course of the
past few years.
I used to care how I sounded, what I looked like, how I would come across.
I used to script, or do something resembling scripting, before I would do
a video.
I did not like the way I looked on video. I still don't like the way I look
sometimes, but I don't really care any more.
It is me.
It is me at better times.
It is me at not so great times.
It is me.
No one is going to look perfect or wonderful all of the time, and it is so silly
now for me to think about how I will look, how I will sound, or what I will
say. While I don't recommend an experience with cancer, it certainly has
been a gift in that I now have a comfort level I never had before in just being
me in front of you.
I must say it is pretty darn awesome.
Ah finally! Letting Go!
ReplyDelete