I had to be an "adult" long before I ever was one. By the time I was a Sophomore in high school, I was mostly on my own. I only went to college because *I* made it happen, and I paid for it. There was no one to hold me accountable, but me. There was no one to pay for it, but me. I started working when I was 16 and I worked through college.
Maybe it was. Maybe it is. So many times there was no one that I could depend upon. I had to make something happen if it was going to happen. It was up to one person. Me. But just because I have been strong, and just because I can be strong, doesn't mean that I am always capable of being strong, or even want to be.
It seems to me that being perceived as strong can be one of the loneliest places to be.
It would be really nice to have a someone to lean on for a change. To breathe a deep sigh of relief, and know that someone is there for me, to know that someone can help with the heavy lifting, and more. Even when I had someone who could have fit that bill by definition of "boyfriend," he was never someone I could trust would catch me if I fell, much less prevent me from falling.
Just once before I die...it would be nice.