Trying to Distract Myself (and it's not working too well)

Kittie Kurls: Buddies til the End

I have been feeling really sad today.

So many times I have seen the two cats curled together.

I found myself wondering if they know what is coming. I found myself wondering if it is good somehow to know what is going to happen.

I have been wondering if the sadness I feel is all "mine." Since I tend to pick up other people, I wonder how my friend is holding up. He hasn't said much, and I haven't asked.



I also wonder if the cats do know, if I could somehow be picking up what they could be feeling.

Tonight Patootie was leading the charge for dinner like she often does. I gave her a bunch of kittie treats today that she just ate right up. The spark in her eye isn't there the way it once was, but in some ways you'd never know that she was having any issues.

I feel beside myself. This feels really intense, really. Logically it doesn't make much sense. I think I might be doing what I used to do before I realized how empathic I could be: I am pointing to parts of my life to explain why I might feel as I do. But it may not be me that I am even feeling. There could be a piece, butI don't know that it is the chunk of grief that I feel.

It is hard to think about interacting with anyone, as I feel I could burst into tears at any moment.